July 2009


What if…?

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 31, 2009  /   7 Comments

Up! “What the hell are you talking about Ryan? This is probably the weirdest start to a blog post I’ve seen yet.” Yeah buddy, you got it, I’m weird; it took you that long to …


Slippery’s When Wet

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 30, 2009  /   5 Comments

OK, so this kayaker walks into a bar and comes out with 67 bucks, a foot massage, Neosporin, a captain’s hat and 789 pounds of goodwill and wellwishes. Waiting for the punchline? There isn’t one. …


And we thought Minnesota was COLD!

Posted by parawing on July 27, 2009  /   No Comments

I’m going to share a funny story that took place over the first couple weeks of our paddling trip. After you finish reading it, please take a moment to vote for us at the link …


I Just Got Dumped :(

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 27, 2009  /   11 Comments

My boat dumped into the water. Gear went flying, and floating. The bow went completely underwater, and my vessel filled up like a cup of tea. This is the first time this has ever happened. …


The River is Life–Whose story is it anyways?

Posted by parawing on July 25, 2009  /   1 Comment

Every movie tells a story, and each story is interpreted by the person who is telling it. When Ryan and I first discussed making a movie while paddling on the Mississippi River, my mind began …


I Feel So Incredibly Important

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 24, 2009  /   5 Comments

Photo courtesy of Mike Longaecker, probably the most thorough journalist I’ve met on this trip so far.  Kudos to you, Mike! I am so important.  I mean I’m an important guy.  Newspaper reporters want to …


Lake Winnie – Rhymes with Witch, Part 1

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 21, 2009  /   4 Comments

“Lake Winnie is a bitch today,” Phillip says.  He shouldn’t say this; no one should.  But everyone does.  Everyone uses swear words, and the people that don’t use them use euphemisms.  Phillip told me that …


My Mom is a Genius

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 20, 2009  /   1 Comment

You’ve got to read this.  My mom, holy crap, wrote this beautiful expose on the truth behind real religious devotees and the fakers.  Phillip told me one time of the Laodicean Chruch, who (I’m paraphrasing) …


Ryan is Wrong, and Phillip is Gone

Posted by parawing on July 19, 2009  /   2 Comments

Ryan has been teasing our readers with brief mentions of our time on two of the large lakes that we crossed early in our Mississippi River journey. These stories are now three weeks old, but …


Ritual Killing or Sail Made out of a Bed Sheet?

Posted by ryanjeanes on July 16, 2009  /   16 Comments

“You never know,” Phil says to me (different Phil), “you could have just paddled into a hot spot of ritual killings.” “I mean,” he continues, “look at all of us.  We’re like 20, and you’re …